Two years ago, I was still in a big company in Shenzhen, attending meetings and writing proposals.
The moment I opened my eyes, there were endless messages. Meetings came one after another—alignment meetings, retrospectives, proposal meetings. We used the trendiest internet jargon to discuss business logic that even we didn't truly believe.
The office was always filled with the white noise of keyboard clacking and the freezing air conditioning.
Many late nights, sitting in a ride-hailing car on my way home, looking at those perpetually lit office buildings, I would suddenly feel a huge sense of emptiness.
It seemed like I was busy every day, but I didn't know what it all meant.
The seemingly glamorous job came at a cost: my time, emotions, and vitality were being drained bit by bit.
Later, I quit.
My wife and I took a long time to travel around the world. We visited over 50 countries.
We hiked in South America, took 12-hour green trains in Central Asia, sat idly on the streets of foreign countries, and met many people living completely different lives.
At first, travel brought me novelty. But later, what truly changed me was something else: it made me feel "alive" again.
Back in the big company, I felt like I was completing tasks every day. But while traveling, I started to notice the wind, the sunlight, the streets, the expressions of strangers, and even the joy from a meal.
Later, we returned to Chengdu.
I had planned to start over, find a stable job, and live a good life.
But coincidentally, during that time, I experienced the birth, aging, illness, and death of people around me very intensely.
Extreme freedom was followed by extreme sadness. Watching vibrant lives gradually fade away, I began to doubt the meaning of existence.
During that time, I often thought: since life is so impermanent, why do we spend our best years in lives we don't truly embrace? I really didn't want to waste my vitality on a life that made me increasingly numb.
I became more and more certain of one thing: I want to live freely. At least, live according to my own will.
But I'm not the type to completely ignore reality.
I have a family. I have responsibilities.
So later, I set a very realistic goal for myself:
First, find a way of living that offers relative freedom in time and space. I don't need to earn a lot, but at least cover the basic expenses of my family.
Over the past two years, I've tried many things.
1️⃣ Cross-border e-commerce
I tried many platforms, but it never went smoothly. Maybe because I have low material desires and no feeling for ordinary consumer goods. Others could instantly tell "this will be a hit," but I felt nothing. In the end, I kept only one small shop, earning a few thousand yuan a month to secure my basic living.
2️⃣ Inbound tour guide
I took orders through overseas social media and OTAs to be a guide. I actually got clients. But reality quickly told me: guiding is essentially selling your time, and every client came with unexpected situations. After two months, I gave up again.
3️⃣ Later, I tried being a travel product agent.
Because "traveling abroad" is what I'm best at. But just as I got an order, international oil prices skyrocketed, the client's flight was canceled, and the whole project fell through. Then various platforms started restricting travel promotion traffic, and my original accounts were ruined. I worked hard on many things, only to find that a speck of dust from the times can easily shatter an ordinary person's plans.
During that time, I often doubted: what else can I do?
Until one day, I suddenly realized:
My old profession was actually software product manager and system architect.
And now, AI has developed to a point where an ordinary person can independently build products.
At that moment, I felt like I had taken a long detour and returned to the starting point.
But this time, it's no longer for KPIs, no longer for big companies, and no longer for success defined by others.
Instead, I can finally seriously create things that I truly want to do and find meaningful.
I can bring to life the ideas that were previously impossible due to time, technology, or process constraints, one by one.
If these things can also help others, then for me now, that is already a very happy thing.
So now, I'm still exploring. I haven't made big money.
But at least, I'm getting closer to a life I truly want: living as freely as possible.